July 22, 2013

The Difference

When I explain to people that I write on this site, I often go to great lengths to try and explain why this site is "different".

The obvious answer is that this is a personal site, one that is dedicated to my experiences as a husband and a father to the three most important people in my life.

Nevertheless, as this site continues to grow, I have begun to find it necessary to specify how we are different from other "daddy blogs".  This is especially important when describing the site to new readers who have no idea who we are and what we are about.

Why are we different?  There are a variety of reasons and it seems that I find a new one every day.

My approach to parenting is not novel or ground-breaking or new.  It isn't solely a "top-down" view of parenting, wherein my wife and I lay down the rules and demand respect; to us, parenting is a collaborative experience, one in which their opinion and preferences and desires are just as important as ours.

To me, parenting is a mutual learning experience.  My children and I are getting to know one another as we all grow up and mature and evolve as human beings.  While I know that I want to show my kids all of the different things I enjoy, I also want to make sure that I take the time to enjoy all the different things that they love.  

However, while I do know that I want this experience to be a collaborative effort, I also understand that I am responsible for laying down a framework of rules and expectations so that they learn to be mature and respectful adults.  Once again, even in this regard, my approach is not novel or ground-breaking of new: I show my children the respect they have earned and deserve so that they, in turn, can show me the same level of respect.  

On this site, I embrace the many different versions of "daddy" that I have become. Some versions are better than others.  And that is okay.  Because, while this site is a memory book for my children to enjoy when they are older, it is also a reminder to all parents (current and potential) that you have to find your own answer to the question: just how in the hell am I going to raise these kids?

Why are we different?  Because we recognize that we make plenty of mistakes; because we are aware that our children are little human beings with their own view of their world; and because we are willing to admit that what we do is not novel or ground-breaking or new.  

No comments: