Earlier today, I had to go dig out the car from underneath the 2 feet of snow Mother Nature graced us with last night.
Lil Sippy Cup decided he wanted to come along to help.
I indulged his request, not really anticipating that he would be of any worthwhile assistance.
After a few minutes of moving small boulders of snow and digging through piles of drift like a gopher, Lil Sippy Cup decided that his energy would be better spent throwing snowballs at me.
Being a mature adult (with several professional snowball fights under my belt), I promptly shoveled a huge pile of snow and dumped it on his head. Then I returned to work.
Without making a single sound and re-stepping in his tracks so as to not create new prints, Lil Sippy Cup snuck up on me and placed a small fistful of snow in my coat pocket.
I am not sure what surprised me more: the fact that he came up with this idea completely on his own.
Or the fact that he is, quite obviously, a trained assassin.
January 27, 2011
January 21, 2011
Brothers and Sons
Me: "Hey, little dude, come here."
Sippy Cup: "What's up bro?"
Me: "Ok, actually, it's Daddy."
Sippy Cup: "Ok."
Me: "So, try it again."
Sippy Cup: "Try what?"
Me: "When I call you over here, what are you supposed to say?"
Sippy Cup: "I'm coming?"
Me: "Well, yes, but what are you supposed to call me?"
Sippy Cup: "Call you? Like on a phone? I don't have a phone. Did you buy me a phone?
Where is it? Does it look like yours? Does it take pictures?"
Me: "Daddy, you're supposed to call me Daddy."
Sippy Cup: "Ohhh, ok! Now give me my phone bro."
January 20, 2011
Dino Cups
Me: "Little dude, I want to talk to you about dinosaurs."
Sippy Cup: "Like brachiosaurus?"
Me: "Right. I don't want you to be scared of....wait...what did you just say?"
Sippy Cup: "Brachiosaurus."
Me: "What...the..."
Sippy Cup: "It's a really big dinosaur. It's huge! Bigger than a building! And it eats plants.
So I'm not scared of it."
Me: "Where in the world did you learn that?"
Sippy Cup: "On Dino Dan."
Me: "Well then, clearly, my job is done. Thank you Dino Dan."
Sippy Cup: "You're welcome."
January 19, 2011
Personal Trainer
Sippy Cup (jumping up and down in front of the book shelf): "One!"
Me: "I believe it's pronounced 'Good Morning' but I could be mistaken."
Sippy Cup (still jumping up and down): "Two!"
Me: "Please stop jumping."
Sippy Cup (jumping up and down): "I can't! Three!"
Me: "Of course not. And why is that?"
Sippy Cup (jumping up and down): "I can't reach the game I want. Four!"
Me: "If I give it to you will you stop?"
Sippy Cup (jumping up and down): "No, not yet. Five!"
Me: "I expected as much. Why not?"
Sippy Cup (jumping up and down): "Because I'm doing my exercises. Six!"
Me: "Why are you doing exercises?"
Sippy Cup (jumping up and down): "Because I ate a lot of junk food last night. Seven!"
Me: "Grandpa said you ate rice, chicken and vegetables last night."
Sippy Cup (jumping up and down): "It makes me strong so I can fight the dinosaurs. Eight!"
Me: "The dinosaurs? What dinosaurs?"
Sippy Cup (jumping up and down): "From the movie. Nine!"
Me: "The movie? What movi...wait a second...you were watching
Jurassic Park with Grandpa again, weren't you?
Sippy Cup (jumping up and down): "Yep. Ten!"
Me (shaking my head): "I need to speak to Grandpa."
Sippy Cup (wiping his face): "Phew! That was good! Now I'm ready!"
January 18, 2011
Sippy Cup, D.D.S
Me: "Dude, you need to go brush your teeth."
Sippy Cup: "No thank you."
Me: "Ok, fine, don't brush your teeth. Then your teeth are going to get covered with germs.
And then they're going to fall out."
Sippy Cup: "That's fine."
Me: "Oh really? You don't want any teeth?"
Sippy Cup: "I'll have teeth. My big boy teeth. When these little ones fall out, my big boy teeth will come down. I'll brush those."
Me (silent stare)
Sippy Cup: "Fine! I'll go brush these little baby teeth for no reason!"
January 15, 2011
January 8, 2011
What I Learned Today (18)
Today, I learned that the quickest way to blow your cover during a secret spy mission to sneak into a room without waking up your son is by accidentally stepping into an open puzzle box and having 48 jagged puzzle pieces stab you in your bare foot.
On a related note, I also learned that the only way to avoid doing a full-on ninja split when you step on 48 jagged puzzle pieces is through divine intervention.
On a related note, I also learned that the only way to avoid doing a full-on ninja split when you step on 48 jagged puzzle pieces is through divine intervention.
